Category: Life

August

I was really about to start a currently post but remembered it was August. Honestly, I am flowing this month. If you know me, you will know that August and I don’t get along. But this month we will work on having a much better relationship. So no, I will not talk about my plans for the month, nor will I stress about anything. I am going to get through August with prayer and patience. But through out the time, I’ll talk about my boring/eventful weekends, or something I would like to share with you.
However,
I am going to watch Sunday’s episode of Power, drink tea, budget my month of expenses, internet window shop, search airline ticket prices for September/October because the plan I’d like to move forward with needs to be put into action so I must go and make things happen, and last but not least; I’ll prep my salmon for lunch/dinner tomorrow.
I hope everyone is enjoying their summer, can’t complain, it has been cool besides the usual ADULTING.

Until next time,

When Reality Hurts

Disa wasn’t lying when she said Good Bye’s aren’t easy.
I want to live in the moment, be happy with how things are, but this is what happens when reality hurts.
The lump of hope that sits on my heart, and the “can we try again?” that is lodged in the back of my throat, makes it harder to grasp.
I try to convince myself that I am prepared for the reality but instead the passenger sitting next to me can barely look me in my face because she is listening to me gasping for air as I hold back tears on our flight back to New York, but its evident, I need more practice.  
Although this change has been written in our script since the beginning, I haven’t quite learned to function in this role. It’s a hell of an adjustment to make, but I hope you see I’m trying. 
Learning how to accept the unknown in our Good Bye’s is the hardest part.
Here comes August…….. Lord be a Guide.

Currently

Fighting to not take a nap right now after eating my left over’s from last night for lunch. Leadership at my current agency is nonexistent due to the close of the company so work has been a drag lately. The days are counting down and I’ve been interviewing for new work. Three offers on the table and one more interview before I decide which position I’ll be going for; looking for work is annoying but I’m grateful for the opportunities.
I’ve discussed my education woes and it is becoming more evident why I need to complete my degree now. Simply, I NEED THE SHIT. All the jobs that I have researched and applied for require it, although I work really hard to sell myself. It has become exhausting to say the least, and it doesn’t stop here. My book is still being written. Finally closing some chapters and starting new ones.
I’m in need of an affordable mini getaway. I have a few vacation days that I will be taking before I submit my resignation. I want to start my new position feeling rejuvenated. Nothing feels better than feeling fresh and new. If I cannot find something soon, I may just find a hotel with a pool and lounge for a day, that always works, but I kinda seeking new scenery. We’ll see what I come up with.
I am also anticipating the weekend. I do not have much planned but I could use the day to clean up my junk drawer, throw out some old shoes, and re-organizing my closet. Going through the motions and adjusting to the new changes that will be taking effect within the upcoming weeks, has me ready to purge my surrounds. Junk, clothes, shoes, old papers, and friends/relationships; Yeah, it gets like that.

I need to wake up, maybe I’ll take a walk.